Think of the time you and your boo have been together. It's probably been a while - likely many years. In that time you've celebrated triumphs, endured hardships, and shared new experiences, all while falling in love. Your wedding ceremony is THE culmination of your romance - few events in your life will rival its emotional significance. That moment in your life deserves more than a cookie-cutter ceremony that's been mindlessly and dispassionately recited for hundreds of strangers. Yours will be mindfully and passionately delivered just once - just for you.
A lot of wedding officiants allow you to "customize" your ceremony by selecting from a number of pre-written passages and readings. It's the quilting approach to customizing a wedding ceremony. Instead, let me weave you a tapestry! Take a deep dive on the intricacies of ceremony theory, then take a look at some of my favorite custom-written passages below.
Your Story, Told With Style And Wit
"Meghan and Christian first ran into each other on a street corner in Geneva, Switzerland. And when I say ran into each other, I mean they literally collided with one another as they each rounded the same street corner. It was early morning, and the two had just wrapped up an evening of dancing and revelry with their respective groups of friends. Christian was on his way to find a breakfast with strong hangover prevention properties, while Meghan was en route to the nearby lakefront for an early morning dip. Christian was wearing his favorite yellow hoodie, and Meghan was wearing her only yellow cardigan. (My yellow tie is to commemorate the occasion of their meeting.) Meghan got her bearings quickly after the collision, gave her very brief acquaintance the once over, and thought to herself – good looking guy, we're both wearing yellow – why not ask him to join me for a swim? Christian graciously accepted the offer, but only to accompany her on the excursion to the lake and not the exercise of swimming itself – Meghan only learned later of his extreme aversion to cold. And so the two chatted while Meghan swam and Christian kept an eye on her belongings. When she finished, gentleman that he his, Christian offered her his hoodie to warm her up. He then invited her back to his place to throw her wet clothes in the tumble dryer. He was growing rather fond of his new friend, and wanted to keep chatting her up. And, in the event that he was totally misreading the vibe, he wanted to at least make sure he got his favorite yellow hoodie back. Which he did. With a wife inside." - Meghan and Christian, 9 July 2014
"As a culture we tend to imagine the world’s great love stories begin in luxurious or unusual places, like a café in Paris or a white sand beach in the Caribbean. But love isn’t picky about where it chooses to manifest itself. For Laura and Nick, it was downright banal – it was at the office. And while the setting may have been commonplace, the journey that led them here is a fascinating one. They met a decade ago, when Nick's new job and Laura's internship had a brief months-long overlap. And when her internship ended, it took them six years to reconnect at that same office. Perhaps the only disappointment in their relationship was realizing what they'd been missing all those years. That relationship endured an amazing trial when Laura was offered what she describes as her dream job – in Austin, Texas. The two decided that neither their burgeoning romance nor this dream job were opportunities they could ignore, and so they made the thing work that everyone will tell you never does – the long distance relationship. Here's how they described it to me: 'It was tough as (let's say fudge) but we endured and grew even closer despite the thousand-some miles between us.' The Lebanese-American poet Kahlil Gibran once stated a beautiful truth that Nick and Laura know all too well: 'Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.'" - Laura and Nick, 12 July 2019
"Megan and Jacob were psychology and nursing majors, respectively, when they first made each others' acquaintance their junior year at Hiram College. (Go Terriers!) They met at a group hang in Megan and Marina's dorm room. Megan, who was immediately sweet on Jacob but too shy to say so, schemed with Marina to lure Jacob back to visit under the guise of needing his help, including flat-out breaking a curtain rod in their room that only Jacob could fix. It didn't take long for him to get the hint, and you can see where it led them. And as the two fell in love, they found they had countless shared interests, tastes, and views. They are eternal optimists. They both dream of owning their dream home together, with a big yard and a dope front porch. They're both cat people – shoutout Katy. They both agree that New Girl and The Office are the height of comedy, and The Walking Dead is the height of zombie apocalypse-based serialized horror-drama. They love the fall, and scary things, and card games and board games and trivia. They both love when it snows, especially if it snows a lot. They both don't mind being in the minority on that snow thing. The list goes on and on!" - Megan and Jacob, 18 November 2023
You can read more examples of my custom-written ceremony content by visiting the ceremony archives.
But There's Much More To Customize!
Those deeply personal passages are crafted from the answers you'll provide to me in my trusty ceremony questionnaire, but you'll also answer questions to help me craft all of the important moments of your ceremony, like selecting readings, how to say your vows, if you wish to include any "ceremony extras" like lighting a unity candle, remembrances for lost loved ones, and more. You'll even have the option to elect one of your attendees to read from scripture or say a prayer during the otherwise secular ceremony.
No, Really! They'll Think We're Old Friends.
"We couldn’t recommend Tim enough! He absolutely made our day and we’re so glad we chose him to be part of our ceremony. Not only was he calm, cool, and collected, but he makes it feel like you’ve all been best friends for years." - Danika S., TheKnot.com
"Tim is so awesome and our ceremony was absolutely perfect. Tim made everything about us and the crowd was kept laughing! The questionnaire was super thorough so even though we didn’t meet with Tim it seemed like he knew us for years!" - Mackenzie B., TheKnot.com
"Tim included special details about us and we received so many comments from our guests that thought Tim was an old friend of ours! He is kind, professional, and committed to making your ceremony special!" - Cameron S., TheKnot.com
"Tim is one of a kind! He did our wedding service and during the reception all of our guests thought he was an old friend of ours, that’s how genuine of a person he is. The ceremony was all about us and made our guests laugh. He was also very responsive and answered any of my questions prior to the big day." - Shanna P., TheKnot.com
"Tim was funny and conversational throughout our whole ceremony. We had numerous people ask us if he was a personal friend! We received so many compliments on his service!" Sarah H., WeddingWire.com
"Tim created such a great narrative and was so personable that our guests were surprised to learn he wasn't a close family friend who knew us all along." Lisa B., WeddingWire.com
"I've worked at a wedding venue for 10 years, so I've seen countless weddings, but Tim is above and beyond the best officiant I've ever encountered. His ceremony was perfectly tailored to my wife and I. Several of our family members asked how long we've known Tim, since he seemed to be a longtime personal friend. That's how great Tim is at what he does, and his love and enthusiasm for his profession really shows through." - Joe, WeddingWire.com
I'm sure you've noticed the theme! These are excerpts from just a handful of over 200 glowing reviews that I've received, but if you don't have time to pore over them all, take my word for it - it's just more of the same.
So What Now, Friend?
Like a tropical fruit moving at high speed... my dates book fast! There's no other way to say it - my custom writing skills and intuitive understanding of ceremony craft are in high demand. Contact me and let's get your fruit in the colander. I mean your date on the calendar.
